Love readings aren't always about love.

Fuck Love Readings.

You know the ones. The ones full of desperation, self loathing and usually involving some guy that’s may or may not be worth the drama. No matter how accurate the reading is or how many times you get the reading done, it’s going to be shit in helping you have more loving relationships.

I hate those readings. I quit reading tarot for other people specifically because of those readings. I started reading tarot when I was 14. I’m fucking good at it, but these types of readings set me on edge.

I don’t have anything against people using all the tools at their disposal for working on their relationships and having love filled lives. There is a difference between healing/growing relationships and staying in harmful cycles. While I would love to help people get out of that cycle, you can’t help someone who isn’t ready to do the work.

Why do I despise these types of readings so much? I promise it isn’t because I’m a love hater.

They focus on the wrong things and they help people to not take responsibility for their choices.

The focus is on X. These readings would be far more helpful if they focused on you and love. (Actual love. Not abusive fuckery.)

You might find that X is great, but both of you need to do some relationship work. Or you might find that X isn’t a great fit for you. When you are focused on love, instead of an individual person, you draw love to you.

If you are someone who always seems to be attracting shitty partners, doing inner work will change that pattern. Trying to become more pleasing to those partners will not. Admitting or understanding that doing inner work is important to healing & breaking these patterns is not the same as taking responsibility for other people’s behavior. Having abusive partners does not mean you are to blame for the abuse. That’s on them.

Tips for better love readings:

Try asking questions that focus on you and your connection to love.

How can I bring more love into my life?

How can I expand my capacity for love?

Is this in coherence with the love I’m looking for?

These types of questions are expansive. They open things up for real love and for healthier relationships.

Try to avoid asking questions that focus on the other person.

Does X love me?

When will I get a date with X?

How do I get X to love me?

Questions that focus on others can be constraining and may block opportunities.

If you do get a Love Reading, take a moment to really think about your question and what kind of relationships you want in your life.


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